Милейшая история о том, как британец сутки ехал плацкартом из Екатеринбурга в Самару

To be honest, I feel that morale would have been higher, two hours in, if my cabin-mates hadn’t opted for hard-boiled eggs and pickled cucumber for dinner. That smell is...not going to shift.

— Rory Smith (@RorySmith) June 22, 2018

I have a wrong to right, and would like to do it on this public forum. The Egg Eaters were a mother and daughter, going to Anapa for their holidays. The mother seemed a little flustered, and possibly a bit grumpy. The daughter, Veronika, liked dinosaurs and was very sweet.

— Rory Smith (@RorySmith) June 23, 2018

We did not talk much for the first 12 hours of the journey, because I don't speak Russian. But there were a group of kids - aged from 5ish to 11ish - who were fascinated by a foreigner. We spent about four hours saying "Hello my friend" to each other.

— Rory Smith (@RorySmith) June 23, 2018

Occasionally, the Mum would ask me if I wanted some fruit or something, because (as those of you up late last night will remember) I was subsisting exclusively on a diet of stroopwaffels and water.

— Rory Smith (@RorySmith) June 23, 2018

I'd made a tactical error - the sort I should be better than - and brought both no actual food, and spent all of my cash on stroopwaffels, so couldn't hit the restaurant car and get a tasty meat sandwich, or spaghetti with cheese. But I was fine, a few hours out from Samara.

— Rory Smith (@RorySmith) June 23, 2018

And then, while I was having a lie down after all that Hello My Friending, I felt a tap. The Mum presented me with a bowl of cucumber, tomato, sausage and bread, and made it clear I was to eat it. She then produced a muffin, and gave me that. She then mimed "you'll waste away."

— Rory Smith (@RorySmith) June 23, 2018

Anyone who has had the misfortune to see me topless would know that is not a risk, and so would anyone who was aware of my late-night stroopwaffel habit. I ate the food - it was delicious - and she promptly produced a second helping.

— Rory Smith (@RorySmith) June 23, 2018

I said thank you, and mimed fullness, but she wasn't satisfied. She produced a packet of strawberry flavoured Jaffa Cakes. I said, through Google Translate, that she had ages left on the train and I was fine, but she ignored me, and placed them directly in my bag.

— Rory Smith (@RorySmith) June 23, 2018

I don't want to be all HERE'S WHAT THE MSM WON'T TELL YOU ABOUT RUSSIA, but not sure that's ever happened to me on a British train. Admittedly, that may be because I rarely board a train without two Grab Bags of Rolos, but still. Well done that lady. Eat all the eggs you like.

— Rory Smith (@RorySmith) June 23, 2018